Even with abundant love for their daughter and the best intentions, Annie* and Tom still needed help navigating co-parenting after their divorce.

“When our marriage ended, Tom and I sat down and promised to do our best to put Megan first,” said Annie. “We knew we needed to make a conscious effort to co-parent for her sake.”

Through joint custody, Megan spent alternating weeks between her parents’ homes. With this arrangement, Annie and Tom did their best to provide their daughter with the support and boundaries kids need, albeit with a few crucial differences in their parenting styles.

Ultimately, this negatively impacted Megan, who had different rules to follow depending on whose house she was at. Over time, these differences caused Annie and Megan to argue because Megan her mom was too strict.

After a particularly heated argument with Annie one day, Megan picked up the phone and called a crisis line for help. That’s when she learned about Children’s Home Society of Washington (CHSW) and the WISe program (Wraparound with Intensive Services) through one of our Family Resource Centers (FRCs). Little did she know that her simple act of asking for help would eventually change her family’s lives for the better.

WISe gathers the important people in a young person’s life and creates a blueprint of support for both the young person and their family. It blends formal meetings with customized services to develop unique action plans for each family.

In Annie and Megan’s case, WISe staff called the family and conducted an initial assessment by phone. Afterward, program staff followed up with a home visit to conduct a more comprehensive assessment. Annie, Tom, and Megan then met with a child and family therapist each month and were also paired with peer supports through CHSW. Annie and Tom also enrolled in our Positive Parenting Program to strengthen their co-parenting skills. Healthy communication was essential to the amazing progress they made together.

Family meetings have been instrumental in helping Annie, Tom, and Megan create shared house rules and consequences that everyone can agree on.

Children’s Home Society of Washington offers an array of behavioral health, family support and early learning programs, like WISe, that are tailored to address each family's specific needs. As a statewide nonprofit family-centered organization, we’re the first line of support for all families before they fall into crisis. That’s why we believe in fostering family and community bonds through extensive networks of resources and services.

Although their marriage may have ended, Annie and Tom are stronger parents today. Together, they walked through fire and became more resilient on the other side. Because of their work as a family unit, their homes are now a peaceful and united front. And because of their co-parenting partnership, they kept their promise to one another: no matter what, Megan comes first.

*All names have been changed to protect anonymity.

Andrew Tucker is the chief behavioral health officer for CHSW